Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Project Life 2014: Weeks 13 and 14

Week 13 was relatively uneventful. I passed my licensing exam (hooray!), worked a lot, and squeaked in some Jordan-time in between work and passing out from information overload.

Became pretty obsessed for a minute with the Juice Shop in San Francisco. I was drawn in just to collect one of those pretty bottles and pick up a juice for breakfast one day, and ended up going back quite a few times. Once I realized that was not very good for my wallet, I buckled down and tried to make a few days' worth of juices at home that I could just grab and take with each morning, but... well, my Jack Lalane Power Juicer couldn't handle my Power Juicin' and the motor ended up smoking halfway through. Yikes! I upgraded to something a little more powerful, but boy, was that no fun.

"Why is the juice coming out of the juicer hot? Oh crap! Shut it down!"

I take it back. Week 13 was plenty eventful. ;)

Week 14 is my favorite week of the year so far, for a few (obvious) reasons.

Not only was it Opening Day for the Oakland Athletics, but it was also my and Jordan's one-year anniversary! It's not coincidence that the two land in the same general time-frame, as we were married on Opening Day last year and skipped off happily hitched to the first game of the 2013 season. This year, Opening Day was the day before our anniversary, so we just celebrated both separately. :)

Those blurred-out cards are little notes that Jordan and I wrote to one another. I asked him to write a card for our anniversary, and he very sweetly contributed. I did the same. I love when he participates!

I'm so proud of the right page. So much happy baseball, so much joy, so much green and gold and faces and fields that I have missed. I included my favorite baseball-related quote in the top left, to celebrate the return of Spring and Baseball -- even if it means reminding myself of the lonely upcoming winter... I'm living in the moment (and the next 6 or so joyous months).

Almost fully caught up now! Feels good, man. Still so love Project Life, even on the quiet weeks.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Hello, Monday: v3

Happy Monday, friends! Three Mondays in a row; I think this might be some kind of blog series record around here. ;)

Someone in my Facebook feed shared a link to an article about a Ukrainian photographer named Vyacheslav Mishchenko, who takes really gorgeous photos of tiny things -- insects, mostly. My favorites of his collection were these absolutely delightful photos of snails:

They're just so bright and whimsical and gorgeous, I couldn't help but share. His other photos are just as stunning! You can view the rest of his collection here.

Here's to a bright, whimsical, and gorgeous week!

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Project Life 2014: Weeks 11 and 12

Week 11: pie, paint, and precious moments. Oh, and so much work. But there were also tacos. So overall, I think it was a darn good week!

Reconnecting with old friends is not always a fruitful endeavor -- time does a lot to people, and it's so much more likely that, after all that passed time, two people grow apart and in different directions than parallel... but it's always such a pleasant surprise when that reconnection goes well. I've been lucky enough to reconnect with two old friends of mine recently who are just absolutely fabulous, and have grown into strong, smart, respectable women. I'm extremely lucky.

Also, it doesn't hurt that they love food, too. :)

Jordan painted a wall in the bedroom this amazing traffic light green, and it really feels like our room now. There's something so comforting about that shade of green to me, pleasant associations. Definitely a good call.

Week 12 was rough. The picture of me and Wally sleeping in the left corner? That was pretty much what I looked like any time I wasn't working or studying for my insurance license. I was able to take a day and get some time in with Jordan, picking Torchlight 2 back up, but I was pretty much wrecked from exhaustion and cramming information into my brain most of the week.

Jordan was kind enough to send me some pictures from a hike he went on with Wally, so I included those. He's been doing that more, which I love, because it's not Project Kayla's Life (though it feels like it sometimes). His little contributions are very sweet and really give it depth for me.

I hope your week is going well, friends. Thank you for all of your kind words to my last post; you truly are the best.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

On Making The Best Of Loneliness

I used to be pretty good at being alone. When I was a kid, I was way more content sitting in my bedroom, bulky headphones on, waiting for my favorite songs to come on the radio so I could hopefully hit the Rec button in time to save it to a blank cassette than I ever was playing in the schoolyard at recess. I enjoyed my alone time, when I could sit and swim happily in not having to impress anyone - or get made fun of - and was just really good at hanging out in daydreams alone.

Fast-forward, and I'm married and everything is great. I have a lifelong best friend and partner-in-stuff, and most evenings we sit and enjoy dinner together and talk about our days and laugh at each other and get all of that weirdness out that we kept inside while we were going about our day with other people that weren't each other. Every day, we get some time together, and it's comfortable and I am happy.

Jordan is going to DevBootCamp next week, meaning he's going to be spending about 12+ hours a day, 7 days a week in San Francisco, learning to code. I am absurdly proud of him -- he has been working so hard and is so dedicated to making this happen. I am so proud. That trumps everything: he is going to DBC to invest in his future and in our future, and that is number one.

... The only thing, though, is that I'm going to hardly see him for 9 weeks. By the time he gets home, I'm likely to be in bed after having worked my own terribly long day, and even if I weren't, he is likely to need to hit the sack with his head full of code.

So, what that means is, I'm going to have time to fill. A lot of it. I'm trying my hardest not to turn inward and say "Oh god, I'm going to be so alone," because that will do nothing but turn me into a big ball of dark sadness, and that's no good for anyone. Instead, I'm trying very hard to focus on what this is: an opportunity.

It's an opportunity for Jordan to acquire an invaluable skillset, along with the confidence that comes along with knowing what he wants to do for work. It's also an opportunity for me to catch up on things that I maybe wanted to do but didn't because relationship maintenance came first.

It's a chance for me to call friends, try new food, go on new adventures. I want to try indoor rock climbing, I want to pick yoga up again and establish a solid, important, and regular practice. I want to spend more time writing here, taking pictures, practicing my script, reading books. I want to take this time to remember what it was like to be happy hanging out with myself. I will be going to a lot of baseball games alone.

I am going to do good things for me, while Jordan does good things for him, and we will come back together after the 9 weeks are up more whole and happy to have our moments together.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Hello, Monday: v2

Monday: full of droopy eyes and big yawns and eyes crossing at full inboxes... here's my attempt at trying to reclaim Mondays as a new start and happy day by sharing something that brings me joy. Be it a song or a photo or a story, I want to get this week started off right!

On Saturday, I'm standing in line for a sandwich with Jordan, when a poster in their window catches my eye:

I see the words "yoga," "stargazing," and "archery," and okay poster, you have my attention. 

It is essentially summer camp for grownups, with all phones turned off, no talk about work, no digital cameras (but analog are okay!), and just letting loose and enjoying being alive without all that pressure of daily adult life.

Kickball. Hiking. Painting. Dancing. Solar carving (?!). S'mores-ing. No drugs, no alcohol, just fun and acceptance and joy.

And my heart explodes.

I've spent the last couple days trying to figure out how to make this work. How to go. Would it really be fun? Would I be comfortable? Do I have a sleeping bag? Would it be nice in theory but end up awkward, with cliques and cool kids, just like summer camp?*

Truth is, it just won't work for me this year. It takes place while Jordan is at Dev Bootcamp, I'll be taking care of the pup and cats by my lonesome, and I really can't afford to take the time off of work.

But damned if I'm not going next year. No excuses. No hesitation. I won't be young forever, and truth is, I don't feel all that young anymore -- but the idea of stealing into the woods and learning archery and pickling and meditating among redwoods and not worrying about my phone buzzing or people talking about their college majors and job titles... just people having fun for the sake of fun... oh, it just sounds blissful. I'm glad something like this exists.

Next year. Next year. Next year.

*Okay, so I never went to summer camp. But summer camp must have had those things, right?